...that I realized something.

It’s MY time.

Not someday. Not when my schedule slows down. Not when the board approves the next project. Not after my next keynote. Not after I lose the desired 15ish pounds to get to 229.9, but when…

Now.

Ironically, it took a 23-hour road trip packed into an SUV with my wife, my eighteen-year-old daughter, my thirteen-year-old son, and enough Buc-ee’s beef jerky wrappers to qualify as hazardous waste (I was trying ) for me to finally understand something Arthur Brooks writes so beautifully in his book, From Strength to Strength.

“Life is finite. Time is finite. The question is not whether you have enough time, but whether you are spending it on what matters most.”

That quote hit me harder than my son’s farts did about six hours into Kentucky…

Which brings me to Asheville, North Carolina.

Asheville Is...Different

I loved Asheville. No, I really did. It was the site of a board of director leadership retreat that I really enjoyed. But for a conservative kid from rural Illinois...

...it felt like someone dumped me into a Pinterest board curated by Willie Nelson and something Denver puked out. I’ve never seen so many CBD signs in my life. CBD coffee. CBD dog treats. CBD soap. CBD beer. CBD candles. I’m fairly certain someone offered CBD-infused kale instead of a Caesar salad at dinner. Every restaurant proudly announced everything was farm-to-table. Fantastic. We had an amazing burger at a great spot for lunch downtown.

Except when you’re traveling with a thirteen-year-old boy whose food pyramid consists primarily of steak, burgers, chicken, and whatever protein Costco happened to rotate into the freezer aisle that week.

The waitress proudly explained at one restaurant where I asked about the special:

“Our locally sourced root vegetable reduction is paired with heritage mushrooms and fermented in organic goat milk...”

My all-too-much-like-his father 13 year-old-son interrupted.

“Do you guys have... steak, like ribeye’s?” I’ve never been prouder.

Asheville was different, and though we rafted through the French Broad River, yes, we mounted and tamed the French Broad…

… the city was just a bit… different… for my kids; my wife and I made the executive decisions to pit-stop in Cincinnati, a city we had never visited and boy, it did not disappoint!

From a Reds game, to a thriving downtown, and clean, district where the Reds and Bengals stadiums sit in between an epic ballpark village area of restaurants, shops, and bars, to a river-front area that was HGTV designed by true land planners with a clue (Hello Illinois…).

A great evening of fun, followed by a wonderful breakfast and of course, had to take the ladies to an outlet mall, before trekking back to Illinois… Cincy was amazing and we’ll be back some day in the future!

The point is, we took a chance on something new, twice…

1. Asheville, not a bust, but not our cup of tea.

2. Cincinnati, never been, but will be back.

3. Time is running out, take the leap of faith and choose to explore.

Through Me...Not To Me

Sunday morning, once home, I completed what I affectionately call my own version of a triathlon.

A ruck to work - 1.75 miles. A yard (a little over 4.16 miles) to prep in my running program for Prairie on Fire race upcoming in 6 weeks. A Leg Lift followed all of that mess.

No medals. No television coverage. No dramatic music. Just sweat, music, ...and one of my favorite podcasts.

Pete Kinder from Peak City Church said something that completely shifted my thinking. God doesn’t simply work to us. He works through us.

Man... How often do I make everything about me? Why is this happening to me? Why is leadership so hard sometimes? Why am I dealing with this criticism? Why can’t people just...

...stop being assholes?

Instead...

What if every difficult season wasn’t happening to me...

...but was happening through me?

Maybe the frustration at work sharpens my empathy? Instead of digging my heels in with that all-too-toxic employee who hates life and seeks to infect his misfortunate on everyone else, at the expense of leadership decision-making, what if I embraced the reality that he is simply in a bad spot in his life and could use a smile and encouragement instead of my resting dick face?

Maybe the setback builds resilience. I’ve spent too much time the past few years getting stronger, faster, leaner, but with one fit in the obsessed workout camp, while the other rests comfortably in a not-too-focused diet plan. It’s just one chocolate chip cookie… of course I want the extra dinner roll with the steak… Just a few Sun Cruisers on the river today… I workout more than most people I know, but my weight sits comfortably in the low to mid 240’s and if I’m being entirely transparent and honest with my readers, I will mentally play the victim when I step on the scale. “Why isn’t it moving?” I’ll pout for a few minutes and then just push replay on my normal day of putting bad shit in front of me and consuming it. It wasn’t until this week when my coach called me out and challenged me, “Every time you think about eating a donut or a chocolate chip cookie, ask yourself if the crowd of people watching you speak would feel motivated watching you eat a donut.”

Boy, truer words were never spoken… It isn’t about trying to look like some Abercrombie model, I’m 45, but it is about feeling confident in my skin on stage. The story is told the same, but there’s no denying there is more confidence at 229 or 239 than 245.

Maybe the criticism keeps my ego in check.

Maybe the platform isn’t mine at all.

Maybe it’s simply borrowed.

In his epic book, Arthur Brooks writes:

“Success addiction convinces us that our value comes from achievement instead of contribution.”

That sentence stopped me cold.

I’ve spent years chasing accomplishments. I still face the chase…

Writing more books. Getting offered to do more Keynotes. Planning and Executing School projects. Planning and Advertising more Summits. Chasing Weight loss.

… The next thing.

The next mountain. The next finish line. Meanwhile...

Something keeps whispering... “Dan...just be faithful with today.”

Twenty-Three Hours

Twenty-three hours in a vehicle sounds miserable to most, right?

Well, parts of it were. I told you about Indiana, Kentucky, and Tennessee…

Then came North Carolina. Construction. Traffic. An Accident. GPS rerouting.

Suddenly we’re winding through 2-lane mountain back roads where every cabin and trailer looked like the opening scene of Deliverance.

At one point I was pretty confident our GPS simply shrugged and said, “Good luck.”

Meanwhile...

My son was laughing. Then farting. Then belching. Then laughing because he farted and grossed his sister out. My daughter talked in her sleep in the passenger seat. My wife reminded me every eleven minutes that perhaps I should slow down just a little and that rumble strips exist for a reason.

Normal family chaos. The kind you don’t appreciate until you realize someday...

...those seats will soon be empty.

Mr. Brooks reminds readers:

“Happiness is not found by adding more to life. It comes from subtracting what distracts you from what matters.”

That one kinda hurts. Because distraction has become socially acceptable.

Phones. Emails. Notifications. Another meeting. Another project. Another excuse.

I’ve always said I’m doing all of this for my family.

This trip reminded me... I also need to do more with my family.

It’s Always Been My Time

Here’s the funny part. Sunday morning, back from vacation,…

I realized that I like the chase, always have, however, 23 hours in a car… river tubing… walking around an odd town and discovering an exciting new one on the way home…

Something kept saying to me, “It’s my time.” Sunday morning workout before yet another going away party for my daughter, it is my time. Time to be fully committed to all the things I chase instead of being halfway in…

It is my time… But that’s not actually true. It’s always been my time. I’ve simply been too distracted to notice. Too busy chasing tomorrow to embrace today. Too focused on outcomes instead of opportunities. Too committed to building a career that I occasionally forgot I was simultaneously building a family.

Family. Faith. Fitness. Leadership.

Not in that order by accident.

In that order on purpose.

No more living with one foot committed and the other hesitating.

No more waiting until life slows down.

Life doesn’t slow down.

It speeds up.

Kids grow up.

Parents age.

Friends move away.

The calendar doesn’t ask permission.

So this Monday morning...

I’m choosing intentionality.

To train hard because I want to hike mountains with my grandchildren someday.

To eat better because discipline is contagious and easy for me to be halfway in, halfway committed to my nutrition.

To pray first instead of panic or complain first.

To put my phone away when I’m with the people I claim matter most.

To lead my school with conviction.

To be there, even for the employee who’s effort bothers me and who’s attitude frustrates the heck out of me.

To love my wife without distraction.

To laugh at my son’s terrible gas because someday...

I’d give anything to hear it again.

(Actually...maybe not anything. Let’s not get carried away.)

Monday Morning Challenge

Ask yourself one question today:

If someone followed me around for the next five days, would they conclude that my calendar reflects what I say matters most?

Because leadership isn’t measured by what we claim to value.

It’s measured by where we spend our time.

It’s measured by how we react when things go south.

Your time.

My time.

God’s time.

It’s all a gift.

I’m doubling down on Family, Faith, Fitness, and Leadership this week.

I’m 7 months into 2026 with a weight loss journey that has me over 20 pounds lost, but still chasing 239.9. The good news, I came back from a conference/vacation down 0.4 pounds overall thanks to some committed action and intention.

It’s YOUR time. Let’s stop treating it like we’ll always have more of it.

Stay in the Game.

Somewhere this morning a school leader is already staring at a calendar that somehow became full before 7:30 a.m. Someone is wondering if they’re making enough progress in the gym. Someone else is trying to become a better husband, father, wife, mother, friend, or leader while quietly wondering if they’re falling behind in all of them.

Welcome to the second half of the year. This is where momentum either compounds…or quietly disappears.

This weekend, after one of the many going away parties for my 18-year old daughter who is set to go off to ‘Bama, I took my lovely wife Karie on a date. Long overdue, but family and work demands seem to complicate this avenue. 26 years ago she stumbled into the Bradley University Jimmy John’s not knowing her future would never be the same… But, a lifetime later, here we are…, on a Saturday night in Ottawa, Illinois…

In a church…

Watching a cover band…

By candlelight…

Far cry from our younger days of slow pitch softball, tent camping after a long day on the river, or a euchre tournament.

We went to see Lumos, a three-piece string orchestra, (See Lumos Here) who covered one of our favorite bands, Coldplay.

While there are many songs from Coldplay’s discography that speak to me, Green Eyes, has been one my wife and I’s songs forever; but the lyrics to Fix You meet me where my feet are right now.

Coldplay’s Fix You has always struck me as an anthem for anyone struggling, disguised as a love song.

Chris Martin wrote it after watching someone he loved experience unimaginable grief. His wife’s father had just died and he wanted to ease her pain. At the same time, their previous album was criticized for being “too soft,” and “past their prime.”

He wanted to make everything okay… for his wife, for his bandmates, for himself… but he couldn’t.

If you’ve spent any time in leadership, you’ve learned painful truths:

You can’t fix everyone’s problems. You can’t erase a student’s trauma. You can’t save every struggling employee. You can’t make every parent happy. You can’t solve every family issue that walks through your front door. You can’t carry everyone’s burden.

But…

You can become the light that helps people find their way.

Fix You opens with an uncomfortable reality.

Sometimes you give everything you’ve got…and it still doesn’t work.

In a school building…

Every principal knows that feeling.

Every superintendent has lived it.

Every teacher has experienced it.

… You prepare.

… You plan.

… You communicate.

…. You give your very best…

…and sometimes the outcome still isn’t what you hoped for.

Leadership isn’t measured by outcomes, it’s measured by whether you keep showing up after disappointment.

As we move into August, schools enter one of the most important seasons of the year.

Back to School Schedules… for students, for staff, for parents, for the community, for athletics, for support staffing, for yourself… I mean, I have to wear pants soon (the summer of shorts is fleeting…)

Professional development. Building Culture. Hiring those unfilled spots at the last minute. Convocation speakers, your welcome back speech. First impressions. Relationships.

The first thirty days don’t determine everything…

…but they influence almost everything.

This isn’t simply preparation. It’s culture construction.

The seeds you plant in August become the harvest you’ll experience in November.

The second half of the calendar year works the same way personally.

Maybe you’ve lost twenty pounds. Maybe you’ve gained five.

Maybe you’ve been crushing workouts while your nutrition keeps pulling you backward. Maybe you’ve started and stopped more Monday mornings than you care to admit.

Momentum doesn’t require perfection. It requires another step.

Another workout. Another prepared meal. Another difficult conversation.

Another sunrise where you choose discipline over excuses.

As the song reminds us, if you never try, you’ll never discover what you’re capable of.

Coldplay spent years hearing people say they were finished. I’ve always liked the band but many people mock them or chastise them for a litany of reasons…

Too emotional. Too predictable. Too soft. Yet they kept writing. Kept touring. Kept improving. Went viral for a CEO/HR Manager uncomfortable jumbotron moment. But they kept showing up.

Criticism has an expiration date. Consistency doesn’t.

One of my favorite moments in the song Fix You comes near the end. About halfway through the song the guitar crescendo builds up to an epic conclusion of the song.

“Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face, and I…

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face, and I…

Lights will guide you home…

And ignite your bones…

And, I will try to Fix You…”

The demands of leading and focusing on outcomes only can cripples us. Not because someone promises to fix everything. But because there’s a promise to learn from mistakes. That’s leadership.

You’re going to miss something this year. You’ll make a decision you’d like back. You’ll say something imperfectly. You’ll trust the wrong person. You’ll underestimate someone. You’ll overreact one day because you’re simply exhausted.

Own it.

Learn from it.

Move forward.

That’s what resilient leaders do.

As for our personal lives…

As men, the second half of the year is often where our commitments get tested.

The vacation is over. The routine returns. The excuses become easier. The calendar gets fuller. Don’t allow busyness to become permission for mediocrity.

Lead your family.

Lead your fitness.

Lead your faith.

Most importantly, outside the 3 F’s, Lead yourself.

Because the people following you deserve someone who is becoming healthier, not just busier.

This week, I’m not trying to fix everything.

Fix your morning routine. As you read this I am currently lifting weights.

After my session, I’m dialing in my planned nutrition for the day with yesterday’s meal prep.

I’m leaving for North Carolina late tonight and freed up my calendar for this conference to better be where my feet are, engaged with the personnel and cultivating meaningful relationships, not distracted by work emails and work problems.

Fix the difficult conversation you’ve been avoiding, I know the one I need to have for my family.

Fix your attention on what actually matters. You may never remove someone else’s pain. But you can become the steady light that reminds them there is still hope ahead.

And sometimes… that’s exactly the leader people need.

Like Lumos and their candlelit performance, this week, be the person who lights the hallway instead of adding to the darkness.

Build momentum. Prepare with purpose. Learn from your mistakes. Lead yourself before you lead others. Because the best school year you’ll ever have…

…is built one ordinary Monday at a time. Stay in the Game.

Not the “Hope you had a great trip!” kind.

The “Let me tell you everything you’re doing wrong...” kind. As a school district Superintendent, you are always ON. The modern progression of boundary-less text messages, emails, direct messages has eliminated grace, boundaries, and the types of conversations people most likely wouldn’t have face-to-face but feel safe behind a keyboard to start.

You know the type.

The kind that instantly hijacks your brain.

Five minutes earlier I was thinking about sunrise runs on the beach, shrimp ceviche, and whether my wife would appreciate all of the fanfare my Mexico nightclub karaoke brings to the table (yes, it’s legendary, ask around).

Five minutes later?

I was mentally preparing closing arguments for a courtroom trial that nobody had scheduled.

Leadership is funny that way.

One critical voice can suddenly become the voice in your head.

One unhappy taxpayer.

One disgruntled employee.

One angry parent.

One anonymous keyboard warrior.

One Board critic.

Suddenly, your brain starts manufacturing an audience that doesn’t actually exist.

You begin preparing to defeat an army...

...when it’s really just one guy with a cell phone.

When I was earning my first Master’s Degree at Aurora University I had a professor in Organizational Theory (sounds as fun as it actually was) share the study by psychologist Thomas Gilovich called the Spotlight Effect.

His famous study had college students wear an embarrassing Barry Manilow T-shirt into a room full of strangers. The students assumed about half the room noticed.

Reality?

Only about 20% even registered the shirt.

Everyone else was too busy worrying about themselves.

I’ve realized leadership works exactly the same way. There’s an old quote, you know the one…

Be kind… it’s such a simple mantra, that in leadership, you wish other’s would heed such simplistic advice… not always the case, right?

There is much providential advice, as a leader, you wished other’s would follow, like treat others the way you’d like to be treated…

… or, if not-faith based, but musician based, take my guy Eddie’s advice…

But, in leadership, when it comes to the minority voice or the loudest critics…

We convince ourselves that everyone is talking about us.

Everyone is questioning our decisions.

Everyone is criticizing the latest initiative.

Everyone is waiting for us to fail.

Most of the time...

They’re not.

They’re worried about their own kids.

Their own mortgage.

Their own marriage.

Their own job.

Their own insecurities.

They’re the main character in their movie.

Just like you’re the main character in yours.

Years ago, that text message would’ve lived rent-free in my head for weeks.

I’d replay it during my morning run.

I’d think about it lifting weights.

I’d rewrite responses in the shower.

I’d build an entire championship speech to defeat an opponent who wasn’t even interested in showing up for the debate.

What a colossal waste of energy.

Vacation reminded me of something different.

I woke up daily to watch the Gulf of Mexico sunrise on my daily runs.

I left my phone in the hotel room all day long.

I didn’t bring my laptop.

I laughed with my wife and kids.

I watched my kids become adults right in front of me.

Those moments were real.

The argument in my head wasn’t.

As leaders, we have to ask ourselves a difficult question:

Am I leading my organization... or am I managing imaginary critics?

Because there’s a huge difference.

When you start making decisions trying to satisfy every loud voice, you stop serving the silent majority who trusted you to lead in the first place.

The loudest voice is rarely the wisest voice.

And it certainly isn’t always the majority.

Leadership requires listening.

It also requires discernment.

Not every criticism deserves equal weight.

Not every complaint deserves equal space in your head.

Not every text message deserves to become your identity.

Here’s what I’ve learned entering 23 years in education.

The people plotting against you...

...usually aren’t plotting against you.

The audience you’re afraid of...

...usually doesn’t exist.

And the people whose opinions matter most?

They’re quietly watching.

Quietly appreciating.

Quietly rooting for you.

Our district treasurer stopped in today to discuss a few matters and what is usually a ten minute conversation spilled into an hour… he’s seen my career arc from a rookie head coach of his daughter when he was a Board member, to a fledgling administrator learning the financial ropes while he was the treasurer, to know a bold Superintendent who makes moves, others don’t… he’s rooting for me.

Your fans… They don’t send nearly as many emails.

So here’s your Monday Morning Reset, on this Tuesday.

Before you walk into your building today...

Ask yourself:

Whose voice am I allowing to occupy my mind?

Is it one critic?

Or the hundreds of people you’re privileged to serve?

Are you chasing ghosts?

Or leading people?

Because leadership isn’t about winning arguments that don’t exist.

It’s about making decisions that matter, even when someone disagrees.

Don’t give one ounce of criticism the power to outweigh pounds of encouragement.

Lead boldly.

Lead humbly.

And if your brain starts inventing imaginary audiences this week...

Remember the Barry Manilow T-shirt.

Odds are...

Nobody’s looking nearly as hard as you think.

Now get out there.

Your people are waiting.

Not for perfection…

But, for your voice, your heart, and your leadership.

There is a weird feeling after accomplishing something big.

The adrenaline wears off.

The endorphins fade.

The excitement quiets down.

And suddenly you’re standing there asking yourself:

“Alright… now what?”

That’s exactly where I’ve been this week and honestly the past couple of months.

Coming off the 3rd Annual Stressed Leaders Summit, I was riding one of those rare professional highs that reminds you why you do the work.

Watching leaders connect.

Watching people laugh.

Watching walls come down.

Watching strangers become friends.

It was everything I hoped it would be. I mean something I dreamt about 3 years ago has exceeded even my expectations and the feedback, the gratitude, the enthusiasm, the momentum is unbridled right now.

And then reality hit.

The summit ended.

The laundry was still there.

The emails were still there.

The calendar was still full.

And my personal life looked like someone hit shuffle on every possible responsibility.

End of school year chaos.

My daughter graduating high school.

Softball coaching, playing career ending.

Watching my kids grow up way too fast.

Work projects.

Family commitments.

Life.

The funny thing about momentum is this:

Sometimes you lose it not because you quit.

Sometimes you lose it because life gets loud.

And if I’m being honest, my nutrition has felt like one of those areas where I lost my edge.

Not completely.

But enough.

A few too many meals out.

A few too many “I’ll re-group tomorrow” moments.

A few too many excuses disguised as being busy.

The guilt, the frustration of seeing Johnny Influencer on X, Instagram, LinkedIn talking about his system, how great his fitness is, and I’m here eating jerky trying to refocus on the nutrition I need to continue this fledgling Built Under Pressure Weight Loss Journey.

And that’s the trap.

Because successful people don’t usually fail because they don’t know what to do.

They fail because they stop doing the things they already know matter.

So this Monday morning, I’m resetting.

Not because I hate where I am.

Because I respect where I want to go.

Father’s Day Reminded Me Why

This weekend was Father’s Day.

And every year that day forces me to think about my why.

My kids.

My son.

My daughter.

The example I’m setting.

I don’t want my kids to look at me and see someone who was perfect.

That’s impossible.

I want them to see someone who kept improving.

Someone who got knocked down and got back up, repeatedly.

Someone who didn’t settle.

Someone who chased growth.

Because the greatest lesson I can teach them isn’t found in a speech.

It’s found in my actions.

They are watching.

They see how I handle adversity. They saw me cleaning up a flooded basement in a 72-power outage.

They see how I respond when I struggle, frustrated by a lack of success in weaker moments.

They see whether I choose comfort or growth.

And I want them to know:

You are never too old to get better.

You are never too busy to invest in yourself.

You are never too far away from your next comeback.

The Second Half Starts Now

The first half of the year was chaos.

Beautiful chaos.

Meaningful chaos.

But chaos.

Overall, I’m still down about 15 pounds, but the Spring of 2026 could be called the Spring of Stagnation.

The second half?

It’s time to rebuild.

Lift consistently.

Run consistently.

Eat intentionally.

Write consistently.

Lead intentionally.

Speak motivationally.

Not because I’m chasing some number on a scale.

Not because I need to prove something.

Because I want to be the best version of myself for the people who count on me.

That’s the real Built Under Pressure journey.

It’s not about never struggling.

It’s about refusing to stay stuck.

So here’s your Monday Morning Reset:

Where have you lost momentum? For me, consistent food preparation…

What habit have you let slide? My ability to seek clarity in the “why” of why I do, what I do.

What version of yourself are you avoiding because starting again feels uncomfortable?

Start today.

Not next Monday.

Not January 1st. And that’s exactly what I did- massive quantities of steak, chicken, and shrimp combo protein stir fry, lunches for the entire week and extra steaks for steak caesar salad dinners.

Today. June 22nd, 2026.

The second half of the year is here.

The question isn’t whether life will get hard.

It will.

The question is:

Who are you going to become because of it?

Built Under Pressure. Get back up with me, today. Our why’s need to see and deserve to the see the best versions of us. Don’t Fu**ing Quit. Stay in the game.

For many school leaders, that means one thing: You made it.

Barely.

You survived the school year. The budget meetings. The personnel issues. The parent emails. The board meetings. The spring concerts. The graduations. The ceremonies. The awards nights. The endless demands that somehow found a way to multiply when you thought your tank was already empty.

Now here’s the question: Did you finish strong? Or did you simply survive?

Because there’s a difference.

I know what many of you are feeling right now.

You’re exhausted.

Not physically exhausted.

Soul exhausted.

The kind of tired that sleep doesn’t fix.

The kind of tired where you wonder if anyone truly understands the weight you’re carrying, quietly.

The kind of tired where other leaders have shared with me in the past, but secretly ask yourself now: “Can I really keep doing this?”

Three years ago, that question became the foundation of the Stressed Leaders movement. It led to a book, it opened the doors for the first retreat, and then it grew to an incredible summit in its third year. We already have OVER 50 leaders signed up!

And that question isn’t rhetorical… not because leaders are weak, but because leaders care.

Because the best leaders I know carry everyone else’s burdens while pretending they don’t have any of their own.

And eventually that catches up with you. I know, because it was, and some days, especially this spring, is me.

That’s why, in two short weeks, leaders from across education, business, athletics, healthcare, and industry will gather at the 2026 Stressed Leaders Summit.

Not for another conference… but, the anti-conference conference.

Not for another binder that collects dust with strategic plans with KPI’s or workbooks, nope, not today Satan.

Not for another keynote you forget by Wednesday, rather, inspiration and practical usage.

This is different. This is a reset. A recalibration.

A reminder of who you are before the job convinced you otherwise.

This year’s lineup is the strongest we’ve ever assembled.

You’ll hear from Jonelle Carter, whose message on leadership, identity, self-talk, and personal growth has transformed leaders across the country. Jonelle doesn’t just inspire audiences, she moves them. She challenges leaders to stop shrinking themselves and start leading from a place of courage, authenticity, and purpose. Monday evening is a celebration of some of the strongest women in leadership that I am blessed to know and you could be too.

Tuesday’s Session kicks off at 9 AM, fired up by yours truly FIRST. You’ll hear from returning legends on Tuesday Jake Carr and Dan Cox, who both have been deep in the lab reinventing their entrepreneurial journeys to share with our guests.

You’ll hear from Justin Pickens, one of the most powerful educational voices in America today. Justin’s story of breaking cycles, overcoming adversity, and becoming the educator students desperately need will leave you questioning whether you’ve been settling for “good enough” when greatness was sitting right in front of you. Getting to know Justin has been a critical improvement in my life and I cannot wait for our guests to see the same.

You’ll experience the energy and wisdom of Phil Januszewski from Positive Growth Lounge, whose ability to connect leadership, purpose, and human growth is unlike anything you’ve experienced. Phil reminds us that positivity isn’t a personality trait, it’s a leadership strategy.

And this is just a glimpse of a few of our speakers… the list of speakers is truly a DREAM TEAM!

You’ll connect with leaders who understand exactly what it feels like to wear the armor every day.

Because leadership is lonely.

Until you realize you’re not alone.

That’s what happens at the Stressed Leaders Summit.

The walls come down.

The conversations get real.

The masks disappear.

The armor loosens.

Leaders remember why they started & begin to remove the Stress from Stressed Leadership.

Every year I hear the same thing:

“I didn’t realize how badly I needed this.”

Every year someone pulls me aside and says:

“This changed me.”

Not because we have all the answers.

But because we create space for leaders to breathe again.

To think again.

To dream again.

To remember that they matter too.

Leadership isn’t about becoming indestructible.

It’s about becoming sustainable.

The world doesn’t need fewer leaders.

It needs healthy leaders.

Resilient leaders.

Purpose-driven leaders.

Leaders who can carry the weight without losing themselves in the process.

Maybe that’s you.

Maybe you’ve spent the last nine months carrying everyone else’s problems.

Maybe you’ve been so focused on helping others succeed that you’ve forgotten to invest in yourself.

Maybe you’re running on fumes.

If so, this is your invitation.

Not next year.

Not someday.

Now.

Two weeks.

One room.

One decision.

You can spend another summer recovering from leadership.

Join us: Sign up Here - Registration closes THIS WEEK!

Or you can spend two days rebuilding the leader behind the title.

The 2026 Stressed Leaders Summit isn’t for people looking for comfort.

It’s for leaders who refuse to quit.

Leaders who want more.

Leaders who know they still have another level inside them.

Leaders who are determined to Stay in the Game.

We’ll see you in the room. Join the DREAM TEAM:

Because sometimes the most important leadership decision you’ll make all year...

Is deciding to invest in yourself.

“Lean Wit It, Rock Wit” - a classic early 2000’s song. It popped up randomly on my playlist this morning during the 4 minute commute to work. For your now 45 year old leadership man, that fraternity boy, nodding along, shoulders popping, vibin’ to that song decades ago seems so far away, I may have to include that in the lunchtime lift later today.

But at this time of year in leadership circles, fresh off a Spring Break recharge, hopefully, we enter a time I refer to as “The April Limp.”

The April Limp

There’s a moment every year… and if you’re a school leader, you don’t just hit it… You feel it in your knees. Not metaphorically. Physically. Somewhere between Spring Break and the end of April, you wake up, swing your legs out of bed, and think:

“Why do I feel like I just played 3 overtimes against the Calgary Flames… with no intermission?”

Meet the April Version of You

The August version of you?

Visionary.
Inspirational.
Walking into opening day like Rocky Balboa running up the steps.

The November version?

Still got some juice. Running on caffeine, systems, and controlled chaos.

But the April version of you?

You’re not Rocky anymore.

You’re Rocky in Rocky 6… icing both knees… pleading with some dumb boy to follow his destiny… wondering why you agreed to this fight again…

The Administrator April Wall

Teachers hit the April Wall, it is certainly a real phenomenon in this industry.

Administrators?

We don’t hit a wall.

We get hit by a bus… then get asked to lead a meeting about it. The fires of lunacy that pop up, employee personnel issues, parent’s demanding to speak to the manager like they are at Burger King, community members ready to string you up for their tax burdens, board of education members who want to know why the culture seems down, maybe you could get them something nice for Teacher Appreciation Week… in May… that’ll fix it all…

You walk into your office and your brain is doing that spinning wheel thing like a frozen Google Chrome tab, and as the resident guy with 84 tabs open my laptop pleads with me like Richard Simmons, “Stop the Insanity!”

• 47 unread emails

• 3 parent complaints labeled “URGENT”

• A staffing issue that somehow became your personality

• A calendar that looks like someone spilled alphabet soup on it

And yet… There you are. Smiling. Nodding. Pretending like you didn’t just search TRS (or whatever state pension system you are reading this from), “Can I retire early at 45?”

You’re Not Burned Out… You’re April’d Out

Let’s call it what it is:

You’re not weak. You’re not losing your edge. You didn’t suddenly forget how to lead.

You’ve just been:

• Solving everyone else’s problems

• Carrying every decision

• Absorbing every complaint

• Managing chaos like it’s your side hustle

For… (check my notes here)…

7 straight months.

Of course you’re tired.

Even your coffee is tired of trying to keep up.

The Analogies Keep Getting Worse (Because It’s April)

Right now, you are:

• A phone on 3% battery with no charger in sight

• A car running on fumes, passing 6 gas stations saying, “I’ll get it tomorrow when it’s not a Real Feel of 26 in Illinois.”

• A Netflix show that should’ve ended 2 seasons ago but somehow keeps getting renewed

And yet…

You keep showing up.

Here’s the part we all need to hear:

The fact that you are still in the building… still answering emails… still solving problems… still giving your people something steady to stand on…

That isn’t survival. It’s leadership.

The kind of leadership that nobody acknowledges, nobody hands out attaboy’s for, and certainly isn’t part of any evaluation.

This Week’s Reset (No Systems, No 10-Step Plan)

You don’t need a new framework right now.

You need a win.

A small one.

So here it is:

Take one thing off that oversized Golden Corral buffet overloaded plate this week.

Not forever.

Just this week.

• Say no to the extra meeting

• Push the non-urgent item

• Delegate something you normally hoard like it’s gold

And when you do it…

Don’t explain it.
Don’t justify it.
Don’t write a 3-paragraph email apologizing for being human.

Just say:

“Not this week.”

That power can be so affirming and satisfying. Not today!

Final Thought

You might be limping right now.

But you’re still moving forward.

And sometimes leadership in April isn’t about sprinting…

It’s about dragging yourself across the finish line like a marathon runner who forgot why they signed up in the first place.

But guess what?

The finish line is real.

And you’re closer than you think.

So take one thing off your plate. Take a breath. And keep going.

Because the world doesn’t need perfect leaders in April.

It needs leaders who refuse to quit, the leaders who Stay in the Game.

Hope this Monday Morning Reset Helped, if it did, consider buying my book, I got a kid at 'Bama! (Click there to buy the book)

Later this afternoon I’ll be delivering my signature keynote for Stressed Leaders to a room full of North Carolina administrators.

School district leaders rarely quit because of kids.
They don’t leave because of teachers.
They almost never leave because of the work.

They leave because of governance, that often forgets its purpose.

A global 2025 survey of school leaders revealed what many of us already know:
Board governance is the number one stressor keeping leaders up at night and forcing Superintendents out of their jobs.

Not curriculum. Not budgets. Not innovation. Boards.

Turnover. Politics. Personal agendas. Parents using board seats as pressure levers. Poor attendance. Role confusion. Meddling in operations while ignoring long-term risk. Accountability that flows downward, but rarely upward.

And when the system breaks?

The school leader becomes the fuse that sparks the explosion.

** I can emphatically say that I am blessed to work with a Board of Education that is supportive, appreciative, and makes policy & decisions for the best success of our students. They are wonderful. They act without the red flags we hear about too often in leadership circles. They support me and trust my decision-making and recommendations… not always the norm in some districts, we are blessed in Seneca.

This Isn’t About Villains. It’s About Structure.

I opened my question from the moderator with something I believe with great conviction about leadership. My job is to support our people and stay out of their way. We hire rock stars and my job is to give them the supports to thrive, to let them be the autonomous experts of their content, offer the opportunity to empower them to build relationships with our students, and to tell our story, loudly and proudly.

Most leaders talk about personalities:

• The toxic chair

• The difficult board member

• The political parent

• The weak admin team member

But this isn’t a personality problem.

It’s a structural problem. Boards often hold extraordinary power with minimal accountability. School leaders are accountable to boards. Boards, functionally, are often accountable to themselves, rather than the representative democracy they were entrusted. It creates instability. It drives away great leaders. And it destroys buildings, communities, and the greater institution of education. When we are spurning great leaders and removing them from the game, our nation suffers.

Not because leaders are weak, but because the system of accountability is misaligned.

The Hard Truth: Governance Can Either Protect Schools… or Poison Them.

Boards exist to serve students, staff, and the long-term health of the institution.

But when boards drift into:

• Politics

• Ego

• Power struggles

• Micromanagement

• Favoritism

• Rubber-stamping friends

• Or avoiding tough accountability

They stop being guardians of mission, and start becoming a source of harm. Those sources create wounds and sometimes will not allow a leader who has been removed, that leaders wounds to scar, much less heal. The tragedy? Most board members don’t want this. Most care deeply. But good intentions don’t replace clear structures, training, and boundaries.

Leaders: Stop Fighting People. Start Building Systems.

Leaders complain about personalities when we should be building systems that even mediocre humans cannot wreck.

Healthy governance requires:

• Clear role definitions (Board = Strategy. Leaders = Operations.)

• Formal onboarding and offboarding

• Skills-based selection, not popularity or donations

• Conflict-of-political interest disclosures

• Independent audits of board effectiveness

• Real training, real accountability, real consequences

Because schools deserve adults who serve students, not themselves. Often times, it certainly is the adults that cause the problems for administrators, but we need to remember that, for the most part, that problem is not out of malice. Whether it be a staff member who’s personal life is impacting their professionalism, a community member trying to stir up the hornet’s nest on an issue, or a board member trying to influence decision-making, there usually is a reason for these issues that needs to be handled in a professional and calm manner. With that said, we don’t deserve to become punching bags for every adult issue either.

The Reset: Courage Over Comfort

This week’s reset is a challenge:

✔ Have the difficult conversation with that Board member
✔ Name unhealthy dynamics without becoming toxic yourself
✔ Set boundaries that protect your staff, your students, and your mission, and yourself
✔ Stop absorbing stress that belongs to broken systems or in some cases broken people
✔ Advocate for governance that is ethical, skilled, and student-centered

You can love your board and hold it accountable. You can honor relationships without tolerating dysfunction. You can protect your peace without abandoning your purpose.

A Boundary for the Week

“I will not carry the emotional weight of dysfunction I did not create.”

You are responsible for leadership. You are not responsible for managing other adults’ egos, politics, or power struggles.

Reclaim your energy. Reclaim your standards. Reclaim your purpose.

Final Thought for Stressed Leaders

Kids don’t burn out typically, but great school leaders.

Broken adult systems do.

Let’s commit to building boards, and personal leadership cultures, that serve:

• Students first

• Truth over politics

• Courage over comfort

• Systems over personalities

• Integrity over influence

Your leadership matters. Your boundaries matter. And you don’t have to sacrifice your health to survive broken governance.

There was a leader at last year’s summit who walked into the room looking like a man who hadn’t come up for air in months.

You wouldn’t have known it if you saw him at work.

At work he looked like every other leader people admire.

Confident voice.
Sharp suit.
The one who always had the answer in the meeting.
The one who never let the pressure show.

But inside?

He told me later it felt like he was drowning.

Drowning in expectations.
Drowning in criticism from his Board, from his staff, from his community.
Drowning in the quiet pressure that comes with leadership in 2026.

The emails never stopped.
The problems never slowed down.
Every decision seemed to upset someone.

And the part that scared him the most?

He had started quietly asking himself a question he never thought he would ask.

“How much longer can I keep doing this?”

Not because he didn’t care.

Because he cared too much.

That’s the part people misunderstand about leadership burnout.

The leaders who struggle the most aren’t the ones who don’t care.

They’re the ones who care so deeply that they keep pushing forward long after their tank is empty.

The Lie Leaders Are Told

For decades we’ve told leaders the same lie.

That the best leaders are the ones who never show fatigue.

The ones who grind harder… Who Sleep less… Who Carry more… Who Push through anything.

But leadership isn’t a sprint. And it isn’t even a marathon. Leadership is the ultimate enduro event- a lifetime summit.

And if we don’t learn how to sustain ourselves in the work, eventually the work consumes us.

That’s why the Stressed Leaders Summits exist.

Not as another conference. Not as another checklist of leadership strategies. But as a place where leaders learn something most leadership events never talk about: Leadership Sustainability.

Because restoration may happen. But the real goal is something deeper. The real goal is helping leaders stay in the game.

What Happened at the 2025 Summit

That leader who walked in looking like he was drowning?

The Monday Evening Singer Songwriter Story Hour allowed us to get to know each other, to talk about our families, our hobbies, and our jobs. I didn’t know him personally to that point, but the conversation began to shift to the same vices & struggles that used to make me drown.

Jonelle & Terry Carter rocked the stage after our dinner. Her keynote about leadership self-talk, combined with the story hour they shared to make us laugh, invoke thought, bring out some of our weaknesses, all the while networking is a perfect start to the event that allows for a lowering of your vulnerability shield. Armor drops, people grow… It was the vision I had hoped for, but my friendship with Jonelle was just beginning to form a year ago… I had no idea she’d bring the fire like she did… boy does she never disappoint.

By the second day something changed.

Not because someone gave him a magical answer.

But because for the first time in a long time he realized something:

He wasn’t the only one carrying the weight.

Around the room were leaders from schools, businesses, healthcare systems, and organizations who all shared the same quiet truth. And as the company founder, the summit host, I still fail to realize just how profoundly I will grow at this event and Jonelle was a key reason for that. A year later, she still changes my world and impacts my leadership. Recently, I had a tough day in the office dealing with some issues and out of left field, received this email:

“Dan- the believer in dreams. The one who doesn’t just open doors to opportunity, but walks beside you to make sure you make it through them. To say you’ve changed things for me and the work that lives in my heart would be an understatement. The impact you make simply by believing in others ripples far beyond what most people will ever see. The lives you help change by championing people and their visions is truly unmatched.”

But, my friend from last year, we sat together talking about his role and his struggle and he admitted:

The pressure is real.

The armor gets heavy.

And leadership can feel lonely at the top.

But when leaders come together in a room where the conversation is honest Something powerful happens. Walls come down. Armor loosens. Leaders remember why they stepped into the arena in the first place. They reconnect with purpose. They rediscover courage. And they walk away not just inspired… But equipped to keep going.

This Is What the Stressed Leaders Summit Is About

The Stressed Leaders Summit isn’t about escaping leadership. It’s not about avoiding stress, it’s about combatting it. It’s about conquering it. It’s about sustaining leadership.

Because the world doesn’t need fewer leaders. It needs leaders who are strong enough to endure. Leaders who understand that resilience isn’t about pretending the pressure doesn’t exist. It’s about building the capacity to carry it without losing yourself along the way.

At the summit we talk about things most leadership conferences ignore:

• The hidden loneliness of leadership
• The emotional cost of decision-making
• The pressure leaders absorb so others can thrive
• The importance of learning how to take off the armor

And most importantly: How to build a leadership life that allows you to stay in the game for the long haul.

Because Too Many Good Leaders Are Walking Away

Across industries we are watching talented leaders step away from roles they once loved.

Not because they weren’t capable.

Because they were exhausted.

The cost of leadership has grown heavier.

The expectations higher.

The criticism louder.

But the answer isn’t for good leaders to disappear.

The answer is to build stronger leaders who can endure the weight of the role without losing themselves.

That’s what this work is about.

If you’re reading this and leadership has felt heavy lately…

You’re not broken.

You’re not weak.

You’re human.

And you’re not alone.

Every leader who cares deeply about their work has felt that moment where the armor gets heavy and the doubts creep in.

The goal of leadership isn’t to become indestructible.

The goal is to remain human enough to keep leading.

Join Us at the 2026 Stressed Leaders Summits

The 2026 Stressed Leaders Summits are being built for leaders who refuse to quit on the work that matters. I’ve presented at conferences about our summits and spots are already filling up!

Leaders who believe that leadership is worth fighting for.

Leaders who want to build the resilience and sustainability necessary to stay in the arena.

If that sounds like you…

Now is the time to step into the room.

Because the leaders who show up at this summit are the ones who are serious about continuing the work that matters most.

And the conversations that happen in that room?

They change leaders.

They change organizations.

Sometimes…

They change lives.

👉 Register now and join us at the 2026 (click here) Stressed Leaders Summits or visit www.stressedleaders.com

Don’t wait…

Your leadership matters. And the world needs leaders who are ready to stay in the game.

That line hits harder than ever in leadership, especially when you feel beat down, stress-riddled, consumed by brain fog, anxiety over indecision, dawg tired fatigue weighing over you.

Because when we’re tired, standards slip.
Not from a lack of care, but from depleted energy.

Fatigue…

… It dulls judgment.
… Shortens patience.
… Weakens confidence.
… Lowers the bar on decisions we normally wouldn’t compromise on.

And the danger?
We start calling it “busy” or “stress”, when it’s really exhaustion eroding our excellence.

Fatigue Is a Leadership Risk

Tired leaders:

• Miss details

• Avoid hard conversations

• Settle for “good enough”

• React emotionally instead of responding strategically

Fatigue impacts the why behind the reasons we do what we do. For example, last week I faced numerous setbacks. A project was hijacked by someone outside of my circle of trust, I had to hold a difficult conversation with a person who would not enjoy the news I delivered, and I felt like I could not get ahead on any of the critical tasks I was doing because I had far too many conflicts on my calendar. One of the more pressing stressors was a human resources decision that I knew I had to make and communicate in a matter that was not typically HR-Compliant. The decision was a message that mattered to my integrity, to who I look at in the mirror when I say I am that type of leader, to who I am, and to why I ever chose to sit in the hot seat in the first place. I could have taken the HR vanilla easy out, but that’s not who I am, standards matter, execution matters, and fatigue will NOT make me a coward.

Fatigue isn’t just physical.
It’s mental, emotional, and spiritual and if left unchecked, it quietly steals courage.

Why January Mattered: Wellness = Standards

January is over and for 31 days I was damn near perfect in my execution of standards I set for myself; I recommitted to wellness as a leadership discipline, not a side goal. I wrote a book about handling stress in a leadership position, but if we marginalize our standards we can fall right back into that snare.

High standards require high capacity.

If I want to lead with clarity, conviction, and courage, I can’t run on fumes.
Rest, movement, boundaries, and structure aren’t indulgences, they’re infrastructures for excellence.

You can’t demand greatness if you don’t protect your energy, that energy that is vital to who I am and why I make the leadership decisions I do.

Your Monday Morning General Patton Reset

Ask yourself this morning:

• Where is fatigue lowering my standards right now?

• What habit this week will protect my energy and leadership edge?

That fatigue is slowly turning you into a coward. Then act, even in a small way:

• Go to bed earlier, no doom scrolling right before sleep

• Say “no” once to someone else’s priority

• Move your body and push it to a limit

• Shut off notifications or put the phone away completely

• Take a real break, without a phone, with the company of your family… like taking in the Chicago Boat Show with your family, where you remind yourself of a simple dream you’re chasing…

Those small resets today protect your bold leadership for tomorrow.

Before confidence shows up, before results, before anyone claps, there’s almost always a quiet stretch where doubt is louder than belief. Fernando Mendoza, the now Heisman Trophy winning National Champion Indiana University Quarterback lived there. Rejected. Overlooked. Told to be realistic. Told to know his place.

After eventually leading Indiana to an undefeated season and entering the NCAA College Bowl playoff, Mendoza was celebrated as the Heisman Trophy winner, saying:

But here’s the leadership truth we don’t say out loud enough: Failure isn’t what takes most leaders out. Fear does. Imposter syndrome does. Waiting for permission does.

Mendoza kept going. One chance turned into growth. Growth turned into belief. Belief turned into history, not because the world suddenly believed in him, but because he never stopped believing in his why.

So here’s your Stressed Leaders Monday Morning Reset for the week:

Stop letting your self-talk sabotage the work you’re called to do.
Stop waiting for validation from others to lead boldly.
Stop confusing “not yet” with “never.”

You don’t need more confidence, you need clarity of purpose. When you know your why, doubt gets quieter. Fear loses leverage. And self-belief becomes a discipline, not a mood.

If you’re standing at the edge of something important, remember this:

Rankings don’t define you. Newspaper or report recognition doesn’t mean you aren’t valid. Gatekeepers don’t decide your ceiling. Sometimes the only “yes” you need… is your own.

Now get up, walk away from the desk, and lead like you believe it.

It’s MLK Day. School is closed, the alarm is off, and for a moment you’ve considered pulling the covers over your head and staying there… because rest feels safer than thinking about tomorrow. Not because you don’t care, but because caring has cost you more than you expected this year. Dr. King didn’t talk about leadership as comfort; he talked about it as courage rooted in purpose, community, and moral stamina.

Today isn’t about powering up, it’s about remembering why you stood up in the first place… today is about asking yourself a simple question, “What are you doing and why are you doing it?”

The answer to that question varies for us all, but the reality is, in leadership, you don’t have to carry it alone. There’s a community of support to help you ascend as we move toward Stressed Leaders Summit: Year 3.

A bigger, better, re-engineered “anti-conference” conference for leaders across all sectors: education, healthcare, public service employees, corporations, small business owners, entrepreneurs, we cater to all leaders.

• New website: www.stressedleaders.com
• New speakers
• More connection
• More authenticity
• Less sit-and-get
• More real conversations with real leaders who get it

If Christmas Break reminded you that breaks alone won’t fix burnout, and here you are just TWO Weeks later, saddled with more anxiety, nervous energy, and worry about what’s to come of your leadership journey, then you need to be in that room.

*** 2025 recap video above…

*** You need to be in this room, with these leaders, in this network: Sign Up Here:

Here’s the leadership truth we don’t like admitting:
A holiday break doesn’t heal leadership stress if we refuse to break our patterns.

And many of you didn’t take my Wednesday advice (Coulda, Woulda, ....)
You meant to.
You wanted to.
But leadership muscle memory is strong.

So now, as I write, it’s Sunday.
And the Sunday Scary’s that many leaders get aren’t creeping in, they’re kicking the door down in mid-January.

This is what Holiday Breaks, and even today’s MLK day off, didn’t fix:

• That unresolved conflict

• That staff member who drains you

• That parent who expects 24/7 availability

• That decision you’ve been avoiding

• That pace you know is unsustainable

• That voice in your head whispering, “You’re already behind.”

But here’s the hopeful part:

You can rebound today.

You can RESET it all, today!

You can choose not to let difficult people rent space in your mind.
You can protect mornings with your family instead of scrolling through complaints.
You can set boundaries that irritate others, but save your sanity.
You can start your Monday with clarity instead of chaos.

And you can commit, right now, to doing leadership differently in 2026.

That’s why the Stressed Leaders Summit exists.
Not as another conference full of PowerPoints and platitudes…
but as a retreat built on relationships, authenticity, and the kind of conversations that actually change leaders—not just inform them.

Thanksgiving didn’t fix leadership stress.
It wasn’t supposed to.

But you’re here.
You’re reading this.
You’re still in the game.

And the rebound starts now.

You can unleash the best version of yourself as a leader, now!

Lazy people don’t know how to start…

Weak people don’t know how to finish…

Successful people don’t know how to stop.

We are the result of our actions, not our aspirations.

Instead of hoping the rest of January, fresh off a break, maybe even sleeping in on MLK Day, is the start of something different, sign up now for a like-minded community of leaders who can help you start today with a Reset: 2026 Stressed Leaders Summits

Coming back from Christmas Break, that line matters more than ever. And we all know the resume of the great leader Teddy Roosevelt and the roadblocks, barriers, and blockades that were in his way.

January exposes leaders fast.

Some come back rusty, Avoiding those tough conversations. Letting expectations slide. Hoping “things just smooth out.”

Others come back worn in, in a good way. Clear. Calm. Grounded. Ready.

My start to 2026 couldn’t be much better, but there’s a quiet reality hiding in the background. While working over break I had to calm myself with the frustration of community politics that I, unfortunately, must navigate. When you are the Superintendent in a small town, live in that small town, even run into your fans at the post office, you have to navigate those run-in’s professionally: calm, grounded, and ready.

January isn’t about reinvention. It’s about reintroduction.

Jay-Z nailed it: “Allow me to re-introduce myself.”

This is the moment to remind:

• Students what excellence looks like

• Teachers what matters most

• Parents what boundaries exist

Not louder. Not meaner. Just clearer.

You’re not changing the mission. You’re tightening the focus.

Rust happens when leaders drift. Momentum happens when leaders decide.

So this week, choose to wear out, not rust out:

• Re-establish expectations

• Reclaim your standards

• Re-anchor your priorities

Leadership doesn’t need you perfect. It needs you present.

Stay in the Game.

My son loves Anthony Edwards and the Minnesota Timberwolves. In late February, he’ll get to see him live, Merry Christmas, bud. We take an annual guys trip based around the KC Chiefs and football, but this year we are pivoting to mountains and Anthony Edwards in Colorado.

Not much of a guy who wants to spend 2+ hours watching dunks, 3’s, and little defense, as parents we sacrifice for the things our children love, and my son loves Anthony Edwards and NBA Basketball. Enjoying Christmas break, we took in the Timberwolves–Nuggets NBA game, which wasn’t just a rivalry matchup, but it was a live case study in how leaders perform when the lights are brightest and the margin for error disappears. Back and forth, two superstars, Anthony Edwards, the explosive high-flying, thunderous windmill dunking guard, and Nikola Jokic, the smooth Larry Bird-esque big man who does almost everything well, these stars went at it, two very different styles, on display… They’ve been here before, many times…

Anthony Edwards came out blazing. Shot-making. Swagger. Emotion. Presence.
Forty-four points of raw force, easy.

And then, late in the game, fresh off a game winning step back jumper the week before…

@timberwolvesHE’S LIKE THAT. 🐜 #nba #minnesota #timberwolves #anthonyedwards

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… but this night, he crossed the line from intensity into interference.
Late in the game, he attempted to disrupt Jokic’s free-throw routine…
The uber-aggressive, full of swagger and head game inducing selfish attempt, earned him a second technical and an ejection in overtime… a teachable moment to my son, sitting in our living room.

The Timberwolves lost more than a scorer in that moment. They lost their center of gravity and greatest game saving weapon.

On the other side of the floor, Nikola Jokic did something the league has never seen:

56 points.
16 rebounds.
15 assists.
18 points in overtime alone.
The first 55/15/15 game in NBA history.

No theatrics.
No posturing.
No emotional leakage.

After the game, Jokic was asked how you close a night like that.

“Don’t get too high, don’t get too low. Just try to control what you can control.”

That’s not a quote built for social media, built for cameras, or replays with folks like Stephen A. Smith. But, think of yourself as a leader in a high pressure situation and re-read Jokic’s comment.

But it’s a masterclass in leadership under pressure.

Crisis Reveals Your Default State

Most leaders don’t fail because they lack competence. They fail because crisis pulls them outside themselves.

Public scrutiny. Board meetings. Angry parents. A medical error. A financial miss. A staff conflict that explodes in real time.

When pressure hits, your nervous system takes over.

And in those moments, leaders tend to fall into one of two camps:

The Burner – intense, reactive, emotionally charged, the frenetic fire fighter.
Or
The Container – steady, disciplined, patient, grounded.

Burners look impressive, until they burn out or get tossed from the game.

Containers don’t trend. But they finish. While my son sat scoffing at the ref’s call, (a reminder officials do not determine outcomes, players do, bud…), I reminded him that Jokic, while slow, silky smooth, and not windmill slamming dunks, just did not miss in the 4th or overtime… he put on a clinic.

Containment Is a Leadership Skill

While I watched the game, I grew more and more appreciative of Jokic. I’m not a regular NBA fan, and this guy, who looks like he could suit up in a YMCA Men’s League, just refused to miss, would not allow turnovers, playing point guard against a full court press, and posting up guards, big men, setting screens, coming off screens, just slowly and smoothly containing the game, within himself. As a Stressed Leader, our containment is the ability to hold charge without leaking it.

To feel everything, and still respond with discipline.

For those crisis moments, it’s staying regulated when:

• Your name is being questioned publicly

• Everyone wants a statement right now

• You feel disrespected, misunderstood, or blamed

Containment doesn’t mean passivity. It means precision.

Jokic didn’t need to disrupt. He didn’t need to intimidate. He didn’t need to showboat or grandstand. He didn’t need to taunt. He also didn’t wilt under pressure. He didn’t need to win the moment.

He just kept executing, over and over again, with the game on the line.

That’s what wins in overtime.
That’s what wins in crisis.

For Stressed Leaders This Week

Most of our readers are on a well-earned Holiday Break, but some of you are facing end of the year crisis. If you’re walking into a high-pressure situation right now, ask yourself:

• What is actually within my control today?

• Where am I leaking energy instead of directing it?

• What would containment look like, not silence, not submission, but steadiness?

You don’t need to perform.
You don’t need to prove anything.
You need to stay inside yourself.

Because in leadership, just like in high-pressure end-of-game rivalry situations, the one who holds their center is the one who finishes strong.

Containment doesn’t trend. But it wins.

And when the game goes to overtime, that’s everything.

—
Stay in the game.

There’s just something about being the “sage on the stage” that I miss from my classroom days, that I love when I teach adjunct at NIU for future Superintendent’s and Chief School Business Officials, and the fulfillment of pouring into others at our Stressed Leaders Summits.

And before I ever say a word into that microphone, I need to say this part, the hard part, out loud:

It takes courage to stay in the game.

It takes courage to write a book that tells the truth, in an open-door vulnerable way, instead of polishing a cookie-cutter story.

It takes courage to stand in front of other leaders and talk about your burnout without pretending that grit, showcasing your own failures, or grit’s step-brother mental toughness, alone, fixes everything.

It takes courage to pour into others, when you’ve been the one quietly carrying the weight, or even been the punching bag and wanted to resign yourself to becoming the victim instead...

It takes courage to be that punching bag, despite your salary, value, worth, or humanity being challenged. Just this weekend we saw somebody, Pittsburgh Wide Receiver, DK Metcalf completely lose his cool and meltdown after relentless taunts from a fan.

Was DK in the wrong? Absolutely.

Did the fan dehumanize a professional athlete in an attempt to bait him into this reaction? Absolutely.

Will this action impact DK and his teammates adversely? Absolutely.

Does this stain DK’s reputation, despite years of charity and community work, not to mention a heckuva career in Seattle and Pittsburgh? Absolutely.

My debut book, Stressed Leaders: Stay in the Game wasn’t written because leadership is easy and without challenges. It was written because leadership, especially in education, keeps losing good people.

“But, that’s why you make the big bucks…” I’m done hearing that and I’m done watching that happen quietly to good leaders, be it on TV or in a Board of Education Room, or a Superintendent’s Office calling me on his or her phone.

WHY ARE YOU STILL STANDING?

Here’s the blunt truth:

If leadership was easy, everyone would still be in it.

But that’s not what wears you down.

Leadership doesn’t break you all at once. It drains you quietly.

In meetings that never end. In emails that hit after dinner.
In decisions where no one thanks you, and everyone has an opinion on how you dropped the ball or misread the situation.

There was a night, one I write about in the book, where I sat alone, exhausted, staring at my phone, contemplating this position I was in, that I fought for, that I worked for, that I take immense pride in my outcomes and results… and asked a question I never thought I’d ask:

“Why am I still doing this?”

Not because I was weak. Not because I didn’t care. Because I was empty. The job title had become my identity and even years later, still challenges the me that I want to be… the me that I want to see in myself… and the me, that others see… A good friend told me a long time ago, that being Superintendent, will consume you, that it will own your identity and you will struggle to know, just who is me?

I wasn’t burned out from the work. I was burned out from carrying it alone.

If that lands for you this morning,…, on a day into hopefully a break from the title… good… You’re not broken.

THE REAL COST OF BURNOUT

Burnout is not a workload problem.

If it were, vacations would fix it.

(Trust me. As the self-appointed King of Cancun, Player of Punta Cana, and Captain of Cabo, Mexico Dan is a nice break, but it didn’t escaping didn’t save me.)

Burnout happens when life gets misaligned.

Leaders don’t burn out because they care too much.
They burn out because:

• Boundaries quietly erode

• Purpose slowly fades

• Identity fuses with the role until there’s nothing left underneath

At some point, you stop saying “I lead” and start living like “this job is who I am.”

That’s when leadership stops being meaningful and starts becoming dangerous.

Burnout isn’t a personal failure… But ignoring burnout is a leadership failure.

Because when you’re burned out:

• Your patience shortens

• Your vision narrows

• Your people feel it before you admit it

You don’t lose passion all at once.
You leak it through a thousand small yes’s you never should’ve given.

YOUR WHY DIDN’T DISAPPEAR

People constantly talk about “Remember your why…” and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that sentiment, but a small piece that leaders won’t admis is the reality, that most of us gave up our “why” to avoid the discomfort…

Here’s what most leaders don’t want to hear:

You don’t hate leadership.
You hate what leadership has turned into, and what it has turned you into, because you stopped protecting why you stepped into it.

Your why didn’t disappear.

It got buried under:

• Emails

• Other people’s fires

• Expectations that were never yours to carry

• The lie that availability equals value

Most leaders don’t need a new job.
They need a renewed reason.

That’s why in my work, and at every Stressed Leaders Summit we don’t talk about “finding your why.”

You didn’t lose it.

You gave it away.

So here’s your Monday Morning, Christmas Break Day of Rest Tuesday reset:

Ask yourself, honestly, not professionally:

• Why did I step into leadership originally?

• Who benefits when I show up healthy?

• What part of my leadership still gives me energy?

That last one matters more than you think.

That’s your compass trying to talk to you.

You don’t need a new title.
You need a clearer intention.

YOU’RE STILL HERE BECAUSE SOMEONE ELSE DIDN’T LET YOU QUIT

Most of us are still standing today not because we were strong enough…

But because someone else refused to let us fall. It’s the reason I try to take every call from a struggling leader, not because my time isn’t valuable, or relationships aren’t transactional, but I don’t want to see others fail and I want to see great leaders Stay in the Game, even when they think they can no longer do it…

Someone believed in you when you doubted yourself.
Someone steadied you when you were spinning.
Someone carried you when leadership got heavy.

Borrowed strength is still strength.

Leadership was never meant to be a solo sport.
There are no gold medals for isolated leaders.

So here’s your challenge this morning:

Text the person who helped you stay.

Send this message—no editing:

“Because of you, I stayed in the game.”

That message might matter more than anything you do the rest of today.

STAYING IN THE GAME: THREE NON-NEGOTIABLES

Emotion doesn’t keep you in leadership.
Commitments do.

So this week, just this week, choose one:

1. Protect One Boundary
One time block.
One personal rule.
Defend it like it matters, because it does.

I chose this weekend to protect my writing boundaries- zero substack newsletter or notes work. I was intentional about my presence, not Christmas presents. I watched the Bears, focused with family, neighbors, and good friends at our house. I spent time with my wife and kids, without phone or email distractions.

2. Name One Person
One trusted voice.
One leadership lifeline.
If you don’t have one yet, that’s your assignment.

I reached out, thanked him for always being a voice to lean into, a shoulder to lean on in the tough times, and for always being my biggest cheerleader. He has little idea how much he has helped me in my leadership journey, but his trust is something I hold near and dear.

3. Choose One Daily Reset
A walk.
Five minutes of stillness.
A written reflection.

You don’t need a vacation.
You need a pause.

I’d love to be sitting under a palapa on a beach somewhere right now… It’s one of my favorite past-times, but you don’t need a beach getaway, and I’m not taking one this break either.

THE STAY STATEMENT

Before you jump back into the work, after the break, sit with this and repeat after me… and if it helps do it in your best Stewart Smally voice:

I will not quit because it’s hard.
I will not walk away because I’m tired.
I will rest, reconnect, and refocus…
because what I do matters, and so do I.

And while Stewart had his purpose on SNL, the reality is the way you self-talk can make or break you as a leader.

That’s not motivation.
That’s identity.

WHY I’M DOING THIS WORK

I didn’t write Stressed Leaders: Stay in the Game to sell books.

I wrote it because too many good leaders were disappearing quietly, and I was one of them four or five years ago.

And the Stressed Leaders Summits exist because reading helps… but community changes everything. I’ve learned that in multiple formats, from an online community of people challenging themselves to Doing Hard Things, to my small local circle.

If this Monday Morning Reset hit you, that’s not accidental.

👉 The book is for the leader I was a few years ago and maybe the leader you are running from right now, wanting to turn a corner into 2026. Get the Book HERE
👉 The summit is for the leader you don’t want to lose next year. Sign up for a Summit NOW

You don’t have to fix everything.

You just have to stay.

Leadership needs you, healthy, hopeful, and STILL Staying in the game.

— Dan

Let’s get something straight before the week starts in this morning’s Monday Morning Reset.

Some friends were discussing their New Years Resolutions… mid-December, while watching some college basketball- Illini vs. Nebraska, sitting around an indoor golfing simulator bar in the suburbs of Chicago.

I was waiting for my family to wrap up some Christmas shopping at an over-crowded store that I wanted zero part of and by coincidence, next door was a place I had heard of and wanted to get a closer look at, X Golf. I wanted to see what the hype was about. I walked in and immediately stumbled into a group of early 30’s grown men, warming up from the -7 degree windchill of a Chicago Saturday Evening.

There they sat, looking somewhat miserable, languishing over a pitcher of cold beers. One of them rose up from his barstool, knees cracking, awkwardly walking to the tee box, making odd noises for a young man. As I ordered my own drink at the bar, smack in the face, I felt myself looking directly into the mirror, his spare tire hanging over his belt, while reading his approach shot into the simulator screen, his friends cajoling his awkward stance, there it was all so clear what I was looking at, the man I was ten years prior… out of shape, slow moving, awkwardly tight clothing around his mid-section, probably thinking about those chicken wings and frosty beer, about to absolutely slice that 6-iron 195 yards out shot.

No doubt, while his friends ripped his prior shanked drive, from the outside I could see, his bad golf slice is like someone swinging hard without fundamentals, lots of effort, no control. Much like the pace of where my life used to be, where I waivered from a workout a couple of days a week to then eating like a 20 year old frat boy and wondered why the scale didn’t move in the right direction… The power is there, but without conditioning, basic nutrition, and alignment, the ball keeps flying into the woods instead of landing on the green, where it belongs, like my life. But, as I watched his friends mocking his poor game, the man plopped down back on his stool and started hammering those wings. He was on a mission of guilt-eating, skinning those chicken wings down to the bone marrow, an impressive feat. I shook my head seeing my own reflection, thinking, I’m sure he’s going to make the change come January 1… right…

We don’t wait for January.
We don’t hide behind “next month.”
We don’t negotiate with weakness.

That’s not leadership.
That’s avoidance.

Warriors don’t need a calendar to tell them when to start.
They start when it’s hard.
They start when it hurts.
They start when everyone else is making excuses.

Your feelings don’t define you.
Your actions do.

That New Year’s Resolution conversation was yesterday. As I drank my drink, dozing in and out of the poor Illini defense on Nebraska’s sharpshooter, I heard them talk about signing up for Orange Theory classes, one man talked about dating his wife more, and another about a job promotion.

Their fading hope and all-too-familiar excuse making, inspired me on my run this morning and an always familiar YouTube Channel’s Motiversity Page popped up on Testosterone.

Some of the most successful men, motivational speakers, sage wisdom spewers, from the grinders themselves, what might they say to these men? What might a Goggins, Jocko, or Hormozi say? What might they say to some grown men, adulating about what they are going to do on January 1? These grown men, who sat listlessly pining for something better, stress eating over buffalo sauced hot wings and frosty brews, dreaming of an improved life? How might these speakers point out the uncomfortable truth?

Coach Pain might Say:

Stop asking how to feel better and start asking how to get better.
Nobody’s coming to save you.
The work is the work, do it anyway.

Mike Tyson might Say:

Everyone has a plan until adversity punches them in the mouth.
Leadership isn’t who you are when it’s smooth, it’s who you are when pressure shows up uninvited.

David Goggins might Say:

Your mind quits long before your body does. Callous it. Suffer forward.
Most people don’t need motivation, they need honesty.

Eric Thomas might Say:

You don’t win because you want it.
You win because you’re willing to bleed for it when nobody’s watching.
And if you’re not intense enough, you won’t finish strong.

Jocko Willink might Say:

Discipline equals freedom.
No excuses.
No whining.
Own everything. Execute relentlessly.

Alex Hormozi might Say:

You don’t need more information.
You need more reps.
More output.
More doing.
Results follow action, not intention.

Now Here’s the Reset for Stressed Leaders

Abraham Lincoln said it best:
“Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

Happiness isn’t comfort.
It’s coping.
It’s contentment while the road is under construction.

A small house can hold as much joy as a big one.
A detour can still offer scenery.
It’s not your position, or title that matters, it’s your disposition… in the hallways, in the office, in a difficult conversation.

And here’s the truth leaders need to hear:

• Happiness isn’t the absence of conflict…

• Leadership isn’t the absence of pain…

• Purpose isn’t found in ease…

The heart is happiest when it beats for others.

That’s the work.
That’s the calling.
That’s the grind worth choosing.

Final Gut Check

You will be denied.
You will be doubted.
You will be tested.

Consistency alone won’t save you.
Intensity aligned with purpose will.

So this Monday:

• Stay disciplined

• Stay consistent

• Stay in motion, even when it hurts

Finish the year stronger than you started.
Not louder.
Not flashier.

As you read this, I’m mid Upper Body Lift, doing the one lift I love more than any others, the bench press. And, I’m nowhere near where I want to be, but I continue to build.

Sharper. Tougher. Stronger. More resolved.

No excuses.
No limits.
Just courage, pain, and purpose.

Now quit thinking about de-stressing at an indoor golf simulator, slicing bad iron shots, between greasy wings and bloated beers, get up and go lead.

*** A few miles in, roughly 2 AM, feeling good, no chance I’m not hitting this thing!

Last year?
I tapped out at 21 miles. No snow, no ice, a lighter ruck, and overall, much better conditions for success.

Quit.
Called it.

Tapped out, like a bitch. At mile 19, an overwhelming pain in my right hip and the repetitive stinging of 40,000+ steps on my achy feet… by the time I got back to the truck for a hydration check & refuel, I had already mentally bailed on the rest of the guys; simply, I was mentally done… It’s been about 100 substack posts since those 13 months ago, but here is a recap of that failure: The Failed Ruck

And the truth is… as we age, it becomes easier to justify tapping out, every single time.
Easier to say “my knees can’t handle it” or “work is too stressful” or “I just don’t have time.”
Easier to let the excuses feel like logic.

It’s been long year since that date… But here’s the rule I’m living by now:
You can miss once. Just don’t miss twice.

For 13 months, I have lived with the regret of that tap out. I have stacked 5 AM lifting sessions on repeat, rucks around my town, on the Illinois & Michigan Canal in my backyard, runs, all to get to this moment.

I have revisited the cold and darkness of my failure at Eagle Creek Park from last year. And this year, as I walked that crunchy ice-packed, snow dusted trail over bridges, through exposed roots that seemed like tripwires, up snow packed slick stairs; I refused to even contemplate quitting this go round.

*** Photo courtesy of Zach Homol, as I rarely even took my phone out during this year’s trek.

This year I was pumped, but variables, factors, hurdles kept popping up the closer the event came nearer.

A multitude of reasons to cancel the RSVP…

1. Due to scheduling conflicts we had to pivot to a 3-week later date… 3 weeks later than the original event, that means from November to December, the Midwest Winter could take its toll and wage white cold windy hell on us… Anyone who knows me, knows I hate winter, not just like “Oh, I hate the biting feeling of the wind on my face…” NO, “How much do I really hate winter?” It’s the feeling of:

   … “The frost-covered emotional assault that makes me question every life choice since 8th grade; why the F**k did I choose to live in Illinois as a functioning professional adult?”

   … It feels “Like watching a Clockwork Orange’s eye-searing, wind-whipped Midwestern trauma simulator that I, annually, for some damn reason consented to on repeat like Groundhog Day.” And yet, I watch this movie, over and over, for 45 years now, every December to March in Illinois; the same pain...

   

   … “The polar-vortex uppercut punch-to-the-balls, followed by Balboa’s Rocky IV’s speed bag training montage work on my soul, that feels like being slapped by an ice-demon with Daddy abandonment issues.”

   … Or more simply, “The daily Lake Effect-air hate crime against my spirit.”

   … “The sub-zero psychological warfare session between me and the wind… sneak peak, somehow the wind is always winning.”

   … You know when people say stupid shi* like, “Oh I love the pretty white snow…”? I think to myself, “Oh yes, the nostalgic Midwest charm, that doesn’t exist, and feels like being bludgeoned by a bag of frozen bricks.” Imagine the Apocalypse Now hazing scene where Private Pile is repetitively bombarded with the pilllow cases of bars of soap.

   

   That is how I feel about winter in the Midwest, a bit much, sure… But, it gets worse every year…

2. Back to the variables of bailing consideration… The new date, worked, sort of… It was December 6th, my son’s birthday was on the 4th and his party, a grill your own steak fest for 13-year old’s was on the 5th, Friday Night. The Friday night before the ruck… In Indy, almost 4 hours away… We’re raising wolves here not sheep, “what 13 year old doesn’t want to eat fire grilled steak and all-you-can-eat salad and baked potato bar on his birthday?” Proud Dad moment!

   To make these logistics work, I would need to:

• Work on Friday…

• Drive the kids to the steak house, 45 miles in the wrong direction.

• Have a great time teaching young men the finer points of grill marks, seasoning, meat selection, pan searing, slow cooking, and life…

*** One of the more expensive birthday parties my kids have ever had, but watching, smack-talking, listening to these young men, excitedly grill their own steaks was all worth it! Trudging through that ruck, in the quiet cold, I spent a lot of time thinking about my wife and kids, who I am so blessed to have; this was a great moment.

• Leave the party at 8 PM, to drive 3.75 hours to Indy, then potentially sleep in my truck for a few hours before the 4 AM start… Just like last year’s failure, a few hours of overnight sleep in a truck, in the church parking lot of the starting point… a recipe for disaster when preparing for an epic 12 hour ruck… yet, another reason to bail that nobody could comprehend why I was internally considering bailing… And folks, this is where the power of community comes to play. In our pre-event discussion about this event, I told the group about my logistic issues, half complaining about the frenetic pace of my life, half laying the foundation of justifying bailing on the event due to my schedule, when our fearless ruck leader said, “We’ll just go at 1 AM when you get there, that way you don’t sleep in your truck again like last year and set yourself up for failure.” A selfless gesture to maximize my effort, not the groups, but my issue. Zach knew how much this event meant to me and flipped the script. As I sat there, letting this resonate, I told myself, “You can miss once, just don’t miss a second shot.”

• I was stoked to hear my coach Mike was going to join me, but then life happens, and his plans changed… At first, I was dejected because any time I can workout and hang with Mike in Indy, it’s always a great time and a physically demanding challenge. His need to cancel stung, but then something inside of me said, “If Mike can’t make it, I will be the one to bring the Best Day Ever vibes and energy to this group.” Mike is always the hype guy who builds you up, and true to form, he checked in multiple times, especially about 8 Am when I was hurting, he left me an audio message that was the equivalent of injecting energy, think the opening trumpet of “Narco” by Blasterjaxx & Timmie Trumpet, directly into my veins that I needed.

  is that guy, especially in those moments when you are down and out, close to tapping out, and need that Coach to push you through the pain cave; I decided right there, after his message, I’ll be that guy for everyone else (the guys later coining it the moment, “Dan went Terminator Mode).

• Maybe one of the biggest roadblocks, mental hurdles, and questioning that befalls me, is the reality, slapping me in the face, pre-ruck… I’m the oldest guy here… Everyone else is an accomplished professional or quasi-professional athlete… National Champion Powerlifters, Champion Body Builders, a guy who once trained UFC fighters, Professional Coaches & Trainers, a guy who Rucks the Appalachian Trail… daily, Ironmen, Professional and Amateur Endurance Athletes, and then… me! The next youngest guy there, 10 years my minor… I’m 45 years old, what am I doing trying to keep up with these savages? It’s the Imposter Syndrome that has an ability to infect my head when I think about leadership challenges, when I stumble upon my own entrepreneurial endeavors with the Stressed Leaders Summits I lead, the keynote speaking opportunities I have had and am getting invited to more of, it’s the tough conversations that nobody wants to have, the books I write, release, and continue to build, it’s the constant state of, “Maybe I’m not cut out for this…”

And then simply, last year I swung… and I missed… I thought, 50K ruck, I can do that, right? I had been training with weight lifting, running, and some rucking for a couple years, I’ll get that 50K, right? Hell I was 360 pounds a few years back and over the span of a couple of years, I had dropped to 250 pounds by last year’s event. But, I completely underestimated the physical pain that kind of an event, 12 hours on your feet, carrying a 25-30 pound ruck (last year) would have on my body, and more importantly, on my mind. I swung… the pain cave took over… and I missed.

Yesterday, in that cold Indiana wind, slogging through snow drifts and frozen mud, I didn’t miss.
I didn’t quit.
I didn’t tap out.

I stepped back into the pain cave, 13 months later, that brutal space where every muscle begs to stop, feet in sharp pain, shoulders aching from the ruck, calves cramping up the last 5 miles… where the trail feels endless, and where the real battle isn’t physical at all.

It’s mental.
Always mental.

And speaking of entering hostile territory…
Today, my Chicago Bears walked into their own version of the pain cave:

Lambeau Field.
A place where the Packers have owned the Bears for decades.
A rivalry defined by heartbreak.
A game that, today, unbelievably… is for first place in the NFC North division, the toughest division in all of football.

The Bears are the underdogs.
The coaches know it.
The players know it.
The fans, as I type on Sunday morning, God bless us, we know it more than anyone. The Cheese Heads, the Dairy Divas, they welcome you into their impressive community stadium, on the frozen tundra, and bring an energy that is unrivaled. I’ve been there, I’ve seen the worst of it… In case, us Bears fans forget, the worst fandom in all of professional sports… wait wait wait… I know I’ve got readers out there in Philly, in NYC, in LA, no offense to Eagles, Dodgers, or Yankees fans, heck even STL Cardinals fans, but the Packers fandom is one of the most ridiculously and flamboyantly proud fan base with little to show… Yes, winning season after winning season, but titles is what I respect. However, they love to throw the recent head to head rivalry in Chicago fans faces with their cheese curd choking, dairy diva debauchery. Brett Favre, Aaron Rodgers, and now Jordan Love, for over 35+ years of success, yet only 2 rings, 1 more than the Bears in a 40 year span. Regardless of the facts, Packer fans, who proclaim themselves as “Owners” of a non-dividend bearing, no voting certificate of ownership stock, think they are “special.” That piece of paper, with no income, no cash value, no proxy voting responsibility is the equivalent of a Cash Raffle for your neighbor’s travel basketball team with no payout. $20 for a piece of paper, thanks for your donation. The Packer Board has swindled an entire fan base who proudly proclaims with their nose up, belly hanging over their belt line, “Yeah, but I’m an owner.” Their favorite pastime is ridiculing Bears fans, not celebrating the 2 rings in the last 40 years; I know well, believe me, I’m related and befriended by far too many cheese wheel loving morons. But Chicago fans, we’ve been to this moment far too many times, and today we remember:

… watching BJ Raji’s fat ass rumbling, bumbling, stumbling into the end zone on a Pick-6 in the NFC Title Game against our 3rd string trembling quarterback after Jay Cutler’s knee injury forced him out. Ruled him out, in what felt like the most important Bears Game of my life…

… our hearts broken by Mitch Trubisky and Matt Nagy’s 20-0 lead at halftime, only to lose a huge lead in the second half, in epic fashion, epic collapse, where Matt Nagy’s “Be You…” eventually forced him to be someone else outside of Chicago,

… from Aaron Rodgers somehow finding a wide open Randall Cobb to go to the playoffs and end the Bears year, again, with everything on the line…

… from Aaron Rodgers, “I still own you…” celebration and man-boy loving Championship Belt gesture that grown overweight 40 year old men would walk down hallways, streets, and in bars, gesturing about their wide waist lines…

Truly, all Bears fans feel stuck… we’re stuck in the devastation and defeat of that Green Bay Packers pain cave... maybe Erin is right???

But, maybe today, he’s not and their not right… maybe today, the tides are changing, I can sense it… something is different… maybe today, led by Ben Johnson, the Bears are ready to not swing and miss this year...

It’s exactly why today matters. Watch the video, feel the emotion, the juice is real…

Because there’s something powerful about choosing to walk into a place where you’ve failed before… and refusing to let your history dictate your future. There’s power in regaining your destiny in the face of familiar losses.

There’s glory in swinging once, missing, but refusing to miss again.

It’s rucking the same trail you quit on last year. It’s turning off that voice in your head begging you and your sore body to quit.
It’s suiting up in a stadium where the ghosts of losses still linger.
It’s showing up on a Monday morning after a week of work chaos and saying:

“Reset. Let’s go.”

That’s the heart of the Monday Morning Reset mantra.

It’s the rejuvenation participants come away from at The Stressed Leaders Summit.

It’s the theme of the book I wrote and continue to revisit: Stay in the Game.

Not perfection.
Not bravado.
Not pretending you aren’t tired, or stressed, or intimidated.

It’s simply choosing to step forward, even when every part of you remembers the last time you fell short, and every physical part of your body is begging, just tap out. Stay in the Game…

On that unwelcoming trail, I refused to fail, I refused to miss. I have the wounds to prove it, damaged toes, soreness as I write on my couch, but my pride and sense of accomplishment and fulfillment is off the charts this morning. Last year, I missed… I was mentally defeated, I resigned to a lesser fate, to an excuse, to a tap out, to an easier exit… This year, not only did I not miss, I was that guy, hyping up the other guys. I was the guy who said “Let’s push the pace and beat this thing,” I was the guy people leaned on and into, I conquered, I did not miss.

*** 50K, 31 miles, 12 hours, a hell of an accomplishment, 70,000+ steps! I did bump my watch adjusting my ruck and didn’t realize it was stopped for about 15+ minutes until I checked it around mile 21, but never fear, it was over 31 miles folks, even with a couple parking lot laps for good measure, I was not missing!

The pain cave is waiting for all of us this week.
Leadership pain.
Work pain.
Exhaustion.
Fear.
Doubt.
Imposter syndrome.
Division rivalries of our own, some in our own heads.

But remember:

The cave is 90% mental.
The trail is conquered one step at a time.
And you can miss once… just never miss twice.

You are capable of far more than your excuses will ever let you believe. Missed a workout, don’t allow yourself to miss again, hit a quick checkdown, don’t miss on the diet, and don’t doom scroll on your phone when you could bang out some pushups instead.

This morning, after I shoveled the driveway, post soreness and pain-inducing ruck, remembering that Motion is Lotion, after such a hell of an endurance event, my buddy Adam texted me, “You are proving it’s mental more than physical; you’re transformation is real.” I shared with Adam that I regret so much from my 20’s and 30’s, but now something is different, that was yesterday, and today I swing again, refusing to miss. In Arthur Brooks book, Strength to Strength, he says, The second half of your life is more fulfilling because you have learned to appreciate the misses from your youth.

Reset.
Step forward.
Into the arena.
Into the trail.
Into the week.
Into the version of you that refuses to quit twice.

Let’s rise———together. It’s OK to miss, just don’t miss again.

*** After I wrote this piece and scheduled it out, I went back into edit mode late at night, post Chicago Bears comeback loss to the impressive looking Green Bay Packers, led by Jordan Love. It isn’t painful to admit how impressive that young man is at leading the Packers offense. It’s reality and his effortless lob passes, on a dime, into coverage seem to always land in yellow gloved hands… sometimes you just tip your cap, even to a rival. I can embrace and appreciate such a rival, even in defeat. Afterall, I started my morning shoveling more snow in the quiet chill, contemplating the event I had just completed, after the miss from last year. Humbling, grateful, and inspired are the words I felt as I plodded around the driveway, each toss of snow a little less strenuous than the last… I spent an epic Sunday with the family over lunch and laughs with our neighbors, hobbling through the parking lot of the sports bar to the front door, feeling happy, blessed. I was then relaxed to watch the Bears Packers 2025 rivalry begin, anew, beside a fire, feet propped up on an ottoman in my comfortable chair in my living room. An epic performance in the second half for our injury-depleted Bears, who stumbled through an ugly first half. But in the second half the offense emerged, spirited, competent, and successful. Ultimately, a thin defense could not get the last stop it needed after the offense rallied to tie it at 21 in the 4th quarter. Down 28-21, facing defeat, Caleb Williams and the running game marched down the field, earning first down after first down; new faces like Luther Burden III & Devin Duverney stepping up in the clutch, around Kyle Monongai’s bone crunching and helmet chipping runs, play after play. Facing a 4th and 1 in the red zone, with options, and seconds left in the game, Williams went for the win, but came up short, an underthrown interception. He swung… he missed… The play was there, had they scored, there’s no doubt Coach Johnson would go for 2 and the win. The Bears fought back, tying the game, and they swung for the moon, coming up just short. Moral victory? Not at all, but a miss… The beauty of the NFL schedule-makers this season, is the Bears get another shot at the Pack, and soon; they do not have to wait a year for a rematch. I waited 13 months to swing again. The Bears only have to wait 13 days for a rematch, in Chicago, with the division lead and playoffs, hopefully, still on the line. In less than 2 weeks, Coach Johnson will have the Blue & Orange ready to fight. They’ll swing and I’m confident they’ll glean more from this loss and meet the resiliency head on next time. They’ll get it done and beat the Pack, tides are turning, seasons are changing, and this Bears team is different, just like I was, 13 months later, on that icy trail.

The company was good.

The couch was undefeated.

But let’s be honest, for many leaders, Thanksgiving didn’t fix a damn thing.

Because while your body was sitting at the table, your mind was replaying an email from that energy-vampire employee… or replaying the conversation you still haven’t had with the high-maintenance parent who somehow lives rent-free in your head.

It’s Sunday, as I write, in the grey of Illinois, fresh of a 9-inch snowstorm thrashing that I am shoveling my driveway, for the third time in 24 hours. As I’m shoveling, rocking out to a mixtape of The Killers, that parent and his distaste for my school is living, rent-free, in my head. The anger is building, the words I want to say out loud boiling, the stressors powering each toss of heavy wet snow.

Like me, you were with your family—physically.
But mentally?
You were still at work.

Before we go any further, let me hit you with the hard sell I should have given you before break:

Registration is officially open for the Stressed Leaders Summit—Year 3, June 2026.

A bigger, better, re-engineered “anti-conference” conference for leaders across all sectors: education, healthcare, public service employees, corporations, small business owners, entrepreneurs, we cater to all leaders.

• New website: www.stressedleaders.com
• New speakers
• More connection
• More authenticity
• Less sit-and-get
• More real conversations with real leaders who get it

If Thanksgiving reminded you that breaks alone won’t fix burnout—then you need to be in that room.

*** 2025 recap video above…

*** You need to be in this room, with these leaders, in this network: Sign Up Here:

Here’s the leadership truth we don’t like admitting:
A holiday break doesn’t heal leadership stress if we refuse to break our patterns.

And many of you didn’t take my Wednesday advice (Coulda, Woulda, ....)
You meant to.
You wanted to.
But leadership muscle memory is strong.

Instead of 24 hours of no fixing work things, you snuck a few emails.
Instead of touching grass, you touched your inbox.
Instead of slowing down, you tried to outrun your own thoughts, like me, shoveling...
Instead of gratitude, you rehearsed frustration.
Instead of boundaries, you defaulted to availability.
Instead of saying “Rest is a responsibility,” you said, “I’ll rest when things calm down.” How do I know this- because I am still fighting not to be that guy!

Except they never do.

So now, as I write, it’s Sunday.
And the Sunday Scary’s that many leaders get aren’t creeping in, they’re kicking the door down.

This is what Thanksgiving didn’t fix:

• That unresolved conflict

• That staff member who drains you

• That parent who expects 24/7 availability

• That decision you’ve been avoiding

• That pace you know is unsustainable

• That voice in your head whispering, “You’re already behind.”

But here’s the hopeful part:

You can rebound today.

You can RESET it all, today!

You can choose not to let difficult people rent space in your mind.
You can protect mornings with your family instead of scrolling through complaints.
You can set boundaries that irritate others, but save your sanity.
You can start your Monday with clarity instead of chaos.

And you can commit—right now—to doing leadership differently in 2026.

That’s why the Stressed Leaders Summit exists.
Not as another conference full of PowerPoints and platitudes…
but as a retreat built on relationships, authenticity, and the kind of conversations that actually change leaders—not just inform them.

Thanksgiving didn’t fix leadership stress.
It wasn’t supposed to.

But you’re here.
You’re reading this.
You’re still in the game.

And the rebound starts now.

You can unleash the best version of yourself as a leader, now!

Lazy people don’t know how to start…

Weak people don’t know how to finish…

Successful people don’t know how to stop.

We are the result of our actions, not our aspirations.

Instead of hoping the first day of December, fresh off a break, is the start of something different, sign up now for a like-minded community of leaders who can help you start today with a Reset: 2026 Stressed Leaders Summits

Let’s reset something before this break gets away from you:

Tough times don’t make you a victim.
Tough times reveal your leadership.

This point in the school year?
Short days.
Stressed adults.
Kids buzzing for break.
You’re putting out fires faster than you can name them.
And somewhere inside, you’re wondering, “Does anybody see how hard this is?”

If you feel like you’re up to your neck without a coach, a mentor, or a guide, you’re not alone. But you made it, today is Thanksgiving Break for thousands of leaders and educators out there; hopefully a time of gratitude and de-stress (more on that below).

But hear me clearly:

Leaders don’t get the luxury of self-pity.
Leaders get the responsibility of rising.

And rising isn’t about powering through with clenched teeth.
It’s about re-centering your heart on gratitude, service, and purpose.

So let’s reset with a story that speaks directly to anyone who feels like they’re fighting their battles alone.

The Reset: Nahshon Wright and the Power of a Beam-like Leader

This weekend, Chicago Bears defensive back Nahshon Wright played with something heavy on his shoulders, and something powerful in his heart.

Just days earlier, he lost a mentor:
Coach John Beam, the legendary Laney College Head Football Coach and Institutional Leader featured on Last Chance U.

If you didn’t get the chance to watch or read about this school, this team, and this man, you missed out.

A man who built young men out of chaos, from the toughest areas of Oakland, California was Coach Beam.

A man who saw possibility in people long before they saw it in themselves.

Beam was shot and killed last week in a senseless act of targeted violence.

He was a father figure to dozens upon dozens of young men, including Chicago Bears former practice squad player, now NFL Interception leading Cornerback Nahshon Wright.

When the news hit,

Nahshon didn’t hide.
He didn’t collapse.
He didn’t make it all about his pain.

Instead, he honored the man who lifted him out of hopelessness.

Minutes before halftime, Wright grabbed a momentum-shifting interception, an acrobatic, ball-hawking end-zone drive and game killing play against his former employer, the Minnesota Vikings.

The next week, against the Steelers, on their first attempt at a deep ball, he made a Superhuman one-handed, “Tony Toe Tap” masterpiece that electrified the stadium.
Against Minnesota, he dropped to a knee, head bowed, overwhelmed.

After the game he said:

“He was watching over me.”

Just hours after losing the man who once pulled him out of bed the day his father was killed… Nahshon rose.

The next week in a “must win” game against the Steelers, back at home, in Chicago, Nahshon made his Beam-inspired impact, felt again.

He rose because someone once invested in him.
He rose because Beam had built leadership into him brick by brick.
He rose because gratitude is stronger than grief.

Nahshon’s journey wasn’t supposed to look like this.
Cut from the Vikings’ practice squad last year.
Fighting for a roster spot on the Bears this year.
No guarantees.
No certainty.
Just hunger, and the echoes of a mentor who believed in him long before it was cool to, long before being a Try Hard meant something.

Now?

He’s one of the NFL’s most dangerous ball-hawking corners.
A leader on a first place team that nobody in the NFL fandom had ever heard of.
A steady force on a battered injury-riddled defense.
A story of resilience in motion.

Your Story: The Nahshon Wright in Every Rising Educator

Let’s talk about you.

You may not have a Coach Beam in your building. You might be trying to be the Coach Beam in your building and it falls on deaf ears…
You may feel like nobody is pulling you out of bed on the hard mornings.
You may feel directionless, unsupported, or completely underwater.

You may even feel like you needed this Thanksgiving Break more than any other educator or struggling leader out there…

But hear this:

You don’t need a Beam to become who you’re meant to be.
You just need to lead like someone is counting on you, because they are.

Somewhere in your school, a student sees you as their stability.
A colleague sees you as their oxygen.
A family sees you as their hope.

You might not have your guiding figure right now.
But you can become that presence for someone else.

That’s what Nahshon did.
That’s what Beam taught him.
That’s what leaders do.

Leaders realize they need to step up and this morning, as you read this, your chance to step up during a Holiday Break may just be to slow down!

Thanksgiving De-Stress Break: Your Survival Guide for the Week Ahead

You’re almost there.
The break is here, but many leaders struggle to actually rest once it arrives.

Here’s your Stressed Leaders Thanksgiving De-Stress Plan: simple, actionable, and effective:

1. Take a 24-Hour Break From Fixing Work Things

No emails.
No planning.
No replaying problems in your head.
Give your brain one full day off from solving.

Pour into your family, your loved ones, put the phone away and don’t open the laptop; take a break!

2. Touch Grass, Literally

Step outside each morning over break.
Ten minutes.
No phone.
Just breathing and being. Even in the cold…
Nature calms the nervous system faster than any strategy meeting.

3. Do One Thing Slowly

Cook slowly.
Read slowly.
Walk slowly.
Slowness is medicine for leaders whose pace never stops.

4. Give Thanks to One Person Who Anchored You This Fall

A text.
A call.
A note.
Gratitude softens stress.

5. Create One Work Boundary for the Break

Choose one:
• No work talk after 6 p.m.
• No laptop on the couch.
• No checking emails before morning coffee.
Just one boundary can save your sanity.

6. Say This Out Loud:

“Rest is not a reward. Rest is a responsibility.”
You cannot pour from an empty leader’s cup.

7. Remember What Beam Taught Wright:

The people we serve deserve the best version of us, not the exhausted, hollowed-out version.

Rest is leadership. Come back from break, stronger.

Your Reset: From Self-Pity to Service

Coming back, next week may stretch you.
Patience may thin.
The countdown to Christmas break will feel slow.

But you are not a victim of your circumstances.

You are the leader of them.

And the fastest way out of overwhelm is not inward, it’s outward:

Toward gratitude.
Toward service.
Toward purpose.

Those three things are the antidote to the chaos.

While you enjoy your Thanksgiving Break, hit those 7 steps and next week, rise like Nahshon.
Lead like Beam.
Shock your system.
Spark your building.
And remember:

You’re not a victim.
You’re the leader.
And leaders rise.

Want more inspiration like this?

You need to attend a Stressed Leaders Summit this summer in 2026, Starved Rock, Illinois and Indianapolis, Indiana: Sign up for a Summit!

While you sip your coffee this morning reading this, some leader is drowning, struggling in a tough spot, share this message with them.

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Maybe it’s the way the sunrise crawls over the ridgeline, slowly illuminating the earth, no rush, no noise, no need to prove itself. Just steady, confident emergence.

That’s how I felt at this year’s IEI (Institute for Educational Innovation) Educational Conference in Santa Ana Pueblo, New Mexico.

After a few week hiatus, the return(s) of the Monday Morning Reset bounces back, fresh from the mountains of the Southwest. The air was crisp, the morning trails quiet, and the conversations electric. Leaders from across the country gathered to talk about what’s next, not just for our schools and our students, but for leadership itself.

And if there was one theme that kept rising through the sessions, through the vendors, through the late-night hallway conversations, it was this:
We can’t stay where we are.

Leading in a small Midwestern Rural area, it’s not often that you get to sit with people who have similar progressive strategies in mind, even elevating your own thoughts and possibilities of what leadership might look like. When we show up together, we make the entire Educational System better!

🌄 The Future Is Generative — If We’re Willing to Be

The drive for Generative AI in educational leadership was front and center. Not as a gimmick. Not as a shortcut. But as a lever for creativity, efficiency, and deeper connection.

AI isn’t coming for our jobs, it’s coming for our excuses. And so many leaders sit: confused, skeptical, even tired, another new tool… My View on AI in Schools Currently

The best leaders in the room weren’t afraid of it; they were exploring it. Asking the hard questions:

• How can AI give us back time to lead people, not paperwork?

• How can it free teachers to inspire, not just instruct?

• How can it help superintendents see patterns before problems?

The message was clear: leadership that clings to “how we’ve always done it” is already behind.

🤝 A Network of Builders

I walked away from Santa Ana Pueblo with more than notes, I left with new connections.

Leaders and vendors who aren’t just dreaming, but doing. People who understand that the next great leap in education won’t come from policy, rather it’ll come from partnerships.

From a superintendent in the Pacific Northwest reimagining student wellness data, to an edtech innovator developing real-time instructional generative feedback systems, these aren’t just ideas. They’re blueprints for a better future.

It was inspiring to see how districts across America are breaking free from mediocrity, and not by accident.

🏆 The Power of Recognition

The Superintendent Awards Ceremony was a powerful moment.

Distinguished leaders from every corner of the country were recognized for doing the hard, unglamorous work: building culture, advancing equity, pushing innovation even when it’s inconvenient.

These aren’t people who play it safe. They’re people who get uncomfortable, and that’s where growth happens.

Watching their stories unfold, I felt a renewed sense of conviction:
Seneca High School can, and must, keep evolving to empower our student’s success.

Not to chase trophies. Not to compete for attention.
But because our students, staff, and community deserve a district that leads with courage, not complacency.

🧭 Elevate or Settle

It’s easy to sit in “good enough.”
To check the boxes. To balance the budget. To meet the standard.

But that’s not leadership. That’s management.

Real leadership means we keep climbing that mountain— even when the air gets thin. It means having the courage to challenge the comfortable, to innovate when others hesitate, and to hold ourselves to a higher standard when “acceptable” would be easier.

Santa Ana Pueblo reminded me that growth doesn’t happen in the valley. It happens on the trail, when you’re breathing hard, a little uncomfortable, and surrounded by people who push you higher. That push… sometimes it comes from others, but often it comes from deep inside, at a time when you want to hang it up, because your breakthrough, at the apex of that mountain, seems too hard to reach, too difficult to navigate.

🌅 The Reset

So as I hiked those early morning trails, watching the sunrise paint the New Mexico desert before the sessions, the 1:1 meetings, the networking over breakfast or red hatch chili queso, I thought about Seneca.

We’ve built something special. But “special” is a starting point, not a destination.

If we want to be the lighthouse district, we can’t settle for flickering light.
We have to keep feeding the flame, through innovation, collaboration, and the relentless belief that our best work is still ahead.

I write, often, about leadership resets. This conference provided me with a reset, that I did not know I needed.

🧠 The Santa Ana Pueblo Monday Morning Reset:

Theme: Growth happens in discomfort. The next level of leadership requires climbing that mountain out of the comfort zone of competence.

Big Idea: Mediocrity is contagious, but so is momentum. Don’t let “good enough” become your ceiling.

My Leadership Call to Action:

• Explore one way to integrate AI or innovation into my leadership this month.

• Reach out to one new professional connection from a recent event and build the relationship.

• Take one sunrise walk this week, outside, in the cold grey of the Midwest, and let yourself think about what’s next, not just what’s now.

We’re not called to lead from the valley.
We’re called to climb.

Let’s keep climbing, Seneca.

The Seasonal Slump Reset: Stop Spinning the Hamster Wheel and Shock Your System

Shorter days. Grayer skies. Crabbier people. Same meetings. Same problems. You’re not broken, you’re just stuck in the season.

This season… Man, I hate the concept of I’m just stuck in this season… this season of life… this weather sucks… the greys of the Midwest Winter… it feels like a cop out, but it also has a reality that is gripping.

If November had a slogan, it would be:
“Dark when you wake up. Dark when you go home. Oh, and here’s a stack of new problems and initiatives.”

I was recently at a monumental education conference and the allure of new shiny initiatives has a power to bring home to the grey dreary Midwest, but adding things to my plate and our staff’s plate does nobody any good. We are already doing some immensely great work and need less “stuff” on our plates.

But that November Rain, that 36 degree spitting, biting Midwest Grey…

You know the feeling:

• The new-teacher enthusiasm is gone.

• Your inbox looks like a confetti cannon went off.

• Every meeting could’ve been an email (and every email could’ve been ignored).

• You walk into the Main Office and see the Substitute White Board and think to yourself, “What in the Hell, did everyone decide it was Staff Thursday Skip Day?” Half your staff is sick, the other half is tired, and you’re somewhere between over-caffeinated scrambler and confused chaos coordinator.

Welcome to the leadership hamster wheel.

The Season Isn’t the Problem, Your Habits Are…

We love to blame the season: the weather, the daylight, the flu, Mercury in retrograde, whatever. But let’s be honest, this time of year, we’ve let our daily anchors drift.

Our routines have turned into ruts.
Our habits have turned into hiding places.
And our spark has turned into a flicker of fluorescent light in a conference room that smells like burnt coffee.

This is your mid-November Reset, the one where you stop blaming the season and start building some backbone.

The Reset Plan: 3 Anchors to Shock Your System

1. Move First. Eat Like a Grown-Up.

Before you even touch your phone, move your body. Ten minutes at minimum. Outside. Cold air, early light, real oxygen.
You’re not training for a marathon, but you are training to feel human again. As I have said many times before, when I accomplish the 5 AM morning lift, and in this season’s case, outside rucks or runs, life just hits different on my work days. Less brain fog, more confidence, a heightened sense of awareness, in short, a better version of me.

Then, eat protein first. Not Pop-Tarts, not the damn Casey’s crappy doughnut, not leftover Halloween candy (even if it’s the top notch mini Almond Joys- yes, one of the all time best candy bars- come at me!), not “just coffee.” Protein. It anchors your energy and stops you from crashing by 10 a.m. when that third meeting starts feeling like detention.

Bonus: No snacking after dinner. Your body isn’t hungry, it’s just bored and you are stuck inside staring at your walls or the latest overhyped Netflix series you don’t need to binge. Take a walk, son (especially after dinner)! Yes, I’m talking to you and to me, strap up, bundle up, take that dog for a walk outside in the cold.

2. Stop Feeding the Digital Monster.

Your phone is a slot machine, and you’re the guy who keeps pulling the lever waiting for validation and some kind of win. Vegas casinos weren’t built by slot machine winners. Your phone is the tentacles of Stranger Things villains.

Delete one app from your phone. Just one.
LinkedIn. Twitter. TikTok. Whatever one has its hooks in you.

If that feels too extreme, hide it in a folder called “Bad Decisions.”
(If you can’t find it in there, that’s a you problem.)

Bonus: Put your phone in another room for the first 30 minutes of your morning or 30 minutes at night. One of my November Non-Negotiables, 30 minutes a day distraction free with my family. The world will survive without your dopamine drip.

3. Get Uncomfortable—On Purpose.

Comfort is killing your edge.
You don’t need another workshop, another latte, or another inspirational quote about balance. You need to do something that reminds you you’re alive.

• Go outside and work out in the cold.

• Take a walk without earbuds. Bonus point if you have any sort of trail near you. In my community we have the I&M Canal and while it’s not my favorite trail, it’ll do (Side note- the project I’m working on will be bringing a new trail to our community- more on that project at a later date.)

• Have the hard conversation you’ve been avoiding.

• Sit in silence for five minutes without checking a screen.

My buddy Dustin calls it “The Dungeon”—the place where you go to focus, sweat, and silence the noise. No distractions. Just discomfort and discipline. I’ve adopted his mantra and am incorporating the cold weather as my personal dungeon. Anyone who really knows me, knows my seasonal affective disorder and disdain for all things Midwest Winter. This is one of my Do Hard Things

That’s where the growth happens.

Call to Action: The Daily Anchor Reset

Every morning this week, I want you to do three things before you start “leading” everyone else:

1. Move your body (10–20 minutes outside)

2. Plan your plate (protein first, no snacking)

3. Silence your screen (30 minutes no phone)

You’ll be shocked what happens when you anchor your day before everyone else tries to hijack it.

We can’t stop the seasons from changing.
But we can stop letting the season change who we are.

So yeah, the weather sucks. The days are short. The work is endless.
But your margin? Your habits? Your discipline?

Those are on you.

Shock your system.
Hit reset.
Stop spinning the hamster wheel and start running your own race again.

P.S. If you need a little more honesty in your leadership life, grab Stressed Leaders: Stay in the Game. It’s 100% rated, raw, real, and probably the only leadership book that’ll tell you to stop snacking and start leading (or at least the only one I’ve read with that message). Get the Book Now